Oil Pulling...Yummmmyy!!???

I have real trouble with my teeth. 

All of my life, my teeth have been very soft, along with my bones and nails, which bend. (my nails, not my bones. I think.)

I have come to believe that this is to do with my diet, and the INCREDIBLY sweet tooth I have always had, and am now doing something about it. 

However, sometimes, we have to expect the consequences of our former actions.

So I have had a filling fall out recently, and I keep getting a very sore gum, and a small abscess that keeps coming and going, and it stops me eating sometimes!!

I have always used mouthwash to deal with any infections previously, but since starting this real food, greener living lifestyle, I am a little reticent to put something in my mouth that is a) full of Fluoride, and b) makes my mouth burn and strips it of saliva!!! (can NOT be good!!!)

My search inevitably started on Google, as most of my queries do, and I came across Oil Pulling. At first I was like, "You do WHAT!?" but the more I looked at it, I started to think that anything must be worth a try, to get rid of this current infection. (Did I mention my extreme fear of dentists??).

The first day, I tried it with the only oil I had in the house, which was olive oil. I used a tsp of it, and put it in my mouth and swilled, like mouthwash. I have to say, the texture wasn't as bad as I had thought, but I could not keep it going for more than about 7 mins before needing to swallow, so I spat it out. As the tutorials say, it should be milky white. Well, obviously, I didn't do it for long enough because it was still yellow oil, very thin, as it gets mixed with your saliva, but not what it should be. 

The first thing I realized though, was why they say to do it on an empty stomach!! the taste of the Olive oil, which I enjoy normally, was sat at the back of my throat, and made me gag a little!! If I had've eaten breakfast, I would definitely have lost it!!!

The next day, I tried again, and got to 10 mins, and no gagging. From there, I have had 2 more days, and and am getting better. I have reached the milky white, and my gum really is starting to feel better. I have some coconut oil coming this week, so I may try with that, instead.

I am always interested to try new things, and some things just need to become acquired tastes, because the benefits outweigh the discomforts.... like oil pulling, for instance.... 

I believe, help Thou my unbelief

Have you ever been through a tough time with God?

Just been through one myself and it is horrid. 

Situations can be gotten through, circumstances can be work through with God, but what if you feel let down by GOD?

I'm so glad we serve a gracious, patient God, because I need time to go through my feelings. 

I find that something that I am SURE the Lord told me would take place, hasn't happened. 

I don't understand. I am unsure of my ability to hear from God, I am disappointed, as I wanted the thing to come to pass. I feel let down, I feel angry, I feel foolish, I feel, I feel, I feel.

But what I feel doesn't count. What do I KNOW?

I KNOW that God is good.
I KNOW that God is faithful.
I KNOW that with God, ALL things are possible.
I KNOW that God loves me.
I KNOW that what He promised, will come to pass.

I cling to the scriptures with Job, "Though He slay me, yet will I trust him" Job 13:15

What I know must always trump what I feel, because feelings change. Truth, God's Truth never does.

Blessed be the name of the Lord.

My week got better

So I have been home schooling all 4 children for 1 full week and they are still alive and breathing!!!!! (you laugh, it was a close one!)

Actually, despite the stresses and strains of settling back into the school routine, the loss of our local weekly Home Ed group, and teaching a very particular boy the ropes, we have had a good week.

Learning how to teach a new child is hard. All my babies learn differently, and obviously have different needs, and Little bud in particular has very specific strengths and weaknesses, so it has been an eye-opening week. 

I know we can do this, despite my near atomic breakdown yesterday, sobbing to Jesus that I can't do it, that I'm not patient enough, and  all the 'not enough's' I could come up with. The scripture that got me off my sopping wet pillow was "i can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me" Phil. 4:13 

When Abba asked me to home school our children, He gave me the scripture 2 Corinthians 12:9, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness" 

It is this that I cling to now, when I feel overwhelmed. My Father told me to do this, and he would strengthen me. I trust in Him and Him alone. I have to, or every day would be spent sobbing on my pillow!!

I am a new creation, and my Abba loves me, and believes in me. 

That's all I need. 

And some coffee......

Different.......but not

The first day as Little Bud Gee........ and he has been a little toe-rag!!!!

You know how it is, right? Temper, tiredness, and rules! Not always a good mix.

Anyway....

We were visiting with some friends today and on the way there (a very long walk) we got to talking. My 11 yr old, Smudge, was saying how much his feet were hurting. This turned into a full blown conversation on how amazing our bodies are and how God made us.

I love that we get to bring God into our every day life, and it made me realize that even though I sometimes doubt, I am making a difference. I am making a difference right where I am, to 4 future grown ups, who will go on to influence their worlds. 

Being a mama is the best job in the world. 

Please Jesus, help me get it right......

Static movement

Can one move forward while standing still?

I have been pondering this question for a long time now. 

Let me explain...

Before I met my Savior, I was a singer. I still am, but my definition of myself was Kim the singer. It's what I did, but it was also very much who I was. It gave me my worth. If I didn't sing, I was nothing. I have been accepted, loved and defined by it my entire life. My mum loved that I was a singer. My whole identity was wrapped up in it.

Then I met Jesus.

From that point on, I was to be defined by what HE says I am. So In His mercy and wisdom, He has stripped me, over the last 6 years of any public singing at all. This coincided with the change of priorities from singing, and my career, to where it rightfully should be, my family. 
I was raised by a very independent, strong female, who always encouraged me to work, to drive, to go after what I wanted. 

Except I'm not a driven person. I'm not someone who has the desire to be that kind of successful. As my mother doesn't know Jesus, she doesn't understand this. So I felt like I was just.....wrong. I wasn't, am not, what my mum is. I'm different. I love my mother, she has been such a support to me through out my life, I'm just different. 

So, day to day life has changed so much for me and at one point a few weeks ago,I felt like I was standing still. We have been waiting for the Adoption of Little Bud to come through, there have been some relationship changes recently that have happened despite my best efforts, we have lost the car, so have limited mobility, and I said to my good friend, I have felt like I am standing in the middle of a storm and everything I know is flying around me, with me stood still in the middle!!!

But I have come to realise, that although I feel like I haven't prayed enough, that I haven't leaned enough on the Lord and probably... well, definitely have tried to deal with things in my own strength too much, I have grown.

I hear my Lord speak clearly, even when I haven't sat with Him in a week. I see His hand in my life, even when I don't understand it. I have had to come to the decision that He knows best and He knows me best. I don't get me sometimes. I'm with the Apostle Paul, when he says "the good that I will to do, I do not do, but the evil I will not to do, that I practice!!!!" Romans 7:19

But I'm also with him when he says "who can save me? I thank God - through Jesus Christ. 
He is the savior, not me. I will trust in him. 

So can you move forward while standing still? Yeah, I'm pretty sure you can, with Jesus.

Life, As We Know It....

Wow, it's been a while since I last posted!!! 

DH has been on holiday so we have been making the most of it by spending some really good quality time as a family! 

Well, I have been struggling lately with having a schedule at all, and meal planning has been a last minute thing, having fudged through half the week before I get my act together!
Does that happen to you?

I want to be more organised, I know the benefits, but I just get waylaid, distracted, and deflated. 

I have had to try and get my focus back onto why I do it. 

I don't do it for praise, (which I often realise in horror that that was my motive) and I don't do it from duty (which it can feel like sometimes, especially when I really want to order a Chinese!) but I do it because it's easier, it's right and it is healthier. I want to do it because God has shown me a better way, and to go back to processed food would be foolish. I want to be a good steward of the family that God has given me, and I am just being a bit darn selfish and lazy when I don't!!!!

I don't like to think this of myself, but Jesus said, you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free. 

Honesty is always the best policy, especially with one's self, so my prayer this week is change me Lord, give me the passion back and give me the energy to do my job as mama and chief caregiver!!!

How about you? Do you tire of healthy living? Do you struggle with enthusiasm and drive to do your best? Leave your tips here.

Getting to that point.....

It is getting a little crowded in here. 

No, i'm not cracking with all the animals, it's that cabin fever feeling that we mamas get when we have been with our children without a break for going on 4 weeks!!!

I had a lovely coffee with a dear friend about 4 weeks ago, and besides sleeping, that was the last time I was without a child. I know my children are getting to the age where they don't need the constant supervision of a toddler, but even when my daughter is in her bedroom, I know she is there and may need me at any moment! 

I love my babies, I am very glad that they are homeschooled, and I wouldn't change that. 

I JUST NEED SOME TIME!!!

Do you hear me, mamas? 

Only problem is, hubby is at work for the next 6 days and so it's another week until I can get   an hour to myself! Noooooooooo!!!

Lots of Prayer and lots of deep breaths, I think!!

And Relaaaaax.....

Phew!!! 

Sometimes, you need an outside perspective on things.

We had our annual Home schooling visit from the Local Authority today. 
I sometimes worry (me, really???!!) about whether the kids are doing ok, whether I need to do more, or less with them and just generally am I doing a good job. (I don't think it is just me)

Well, our reviewing officer was very pleased with what we are doing, and how much the children are learning, and the variety, so I was worrying for nothing at midnight last night!

I know my children, and I am so glad that we decided to homeschool them, but, as with most aspects of parenting, I am sometime struck down with doubt. I worry. I shouldn't, I know, if God is truly my Father, He will take care of us, and prompt me. I can't help it sometimes though, and in His gracious mercy, He sends me encouragement when I need it. 

My children are happy, healthy and bright. They are unique, special and confident. They are polite, talented and a gift from God. 

Lord help me to guide and cherish these beautiful presents and help them and I to live every day in Your Glorious Presence 
Amen

Do You Know...?

Do you know how I feel?

I'm sure you do. When everything in your life feels like it is spinning all around you and you are in the eye of the storm.

Being melodramatic is kind of in my nature, but sometimes, just sometimes, it really feels like you don't know your right from your left. 

Certain things are changing in our house, and one of the biggest ones is me. My Father in heaven loves me too much to stay the same, and when He shows you the truth about yourself, it's usually wise to listen. 

This is one of the most painful times in life, when you realise who you truly are, rather than who you think you are, but Jesus said "you shall know the truth and the truth shall make you free".

Letting go of who you thought you were, now there is the hard part. 

How do you learn who you are? 

How do you judge what is you and what is who you want to be? How do you stop trying to please everyone else and look at what is truly in your heart? 

I had thought I was making progress with this and in one way I was. Deciding to home school my children goes completely against the grain of what everyone in my life believes in, and thought I was capable of. And it really wasn't that scary once we did it. 

So how do I go from one brave step to sorting through the influences that have shaped me to believe I must be a certain way, act a certain way, do certain things to be accepted, when I have spent most of my life striving for this and disappointing anyway?

Who am I really? 

Only my Father can tell me that. 

He allows discomfort in our lives for one primary purpose: to bring us running to Him. 

Such a shame that we stubborn creatures run like Jonah did in the opposite direction more often than not! 

Well, I want answers and for that I need to run TO Him not AWAY from Him. Only he can show me who I am, and then make me happy with it.

I am not what my husband thinks I am, nor my Mother, nor siblings, nor friends, nor public. 
I am what God thinks I am.

I'm worth dying for. Not because I did anything worthy, just simply because God  loves me.

And He loves you too.
x 

Sunday Thoughts

Oh the joys of a boys' sleepover!!

Haribo had 2 friends over for his birthday, but they wanted to sleep in the front room, so I was ousted to the back dining room for my quiet time this morning, but it is sometimes nice to have a change.

I don't know about you, but sometimes (quite often) I am plagued with doubts, about whether I am doing a good job with these children the Lord has blessed me with, whether I am a good wife to my amazing husband, whether I am doing all and being all the Lord wants me to do and be, or whether I even heard Him right! 

I had one of those moments this morning, so I poured my heart out to my Father. 

And He answered, as only He could, through His word. 

This Pentecost Sunday, I am so very thankful that the Holy Spirit lives in me to correct, to communicate and to enable me to live as God wants me to, even if I don't always get it right!

And I think I'm fine with that, because He is always there to pick me back up, like the amazing Abba He is! 

Thank you Abba Father.